I’m scared

Here’s something you probably don’t know about me. I am a wuss, a W-U-S-S, when it comes to scary movies. I do not do well with them. They get stuck in my head and I replay the worst parts of them in my mind and get all freaked out for months after seeing them. I am still feeling the effects of Pet Sematary and Texas Chain Saw Massacre, which I saw when I was 14. And I am now 31.

Joey, on the other hand, loves scary movies and can watch them and fall right to sleep in a dark room afterwards, no matter how many eerie creaks and thuds are coming from the house. It drives him nuts that I refuse to see horror movies, but I am just so very good at being horrified by them.

But now…now we have a personal connection to a horror movie and I fear (like, really, really fear) that I may have to see the new Nightmare on Elm Street movie. You guys!!!! I can hardly stand to watch the previews for it! I close my eyes and plug my ears every time it comes on!

Here’s the deal – one of Joey’s college roommates was involved in making the movie. Sounds all important, doesn’t it? It’s a very exciting moment for our friend, but if you could meet him…well, let’s just say he’s total dude who makes fart jokes, drinks beer and has a knack for being the life of any party. He’s a really great guy and we want to support his efforts, which means going to see the movie this weekend, because “it’s more important for you to go opening weekend than any other weekend.”

(Insert whiny crying voice) “I don’t wanna gooooooohhhhhaaaa!” I mean I do, cause I’m so happy for our friend, but I’m so sccaaaarrrrreddddahhhh!

I know it will lead to numerous occasions where I try convincing myself that Freddy will not kill me in my dreams or attack me in the shower or jump me when I walk to my car. You know the movie Donna Darko? Not scary at all, but I still think that stupid rabbit is going to show up in my bathroom at any moment.

So now you know. I’ve admitted to being a total childish wimp. A grown woman who squeals and hides her eyes in her hands even during Lost when they start hearing those weird whisper noises in the jungle.

My plan to survive this movie is to remember all the hilarious memories I have of our friend doing way unscary things. I’m hoping this will help me remember that Freddy is a fictional character (right???) and Nightmare on Elm Street is not a documentary.

If you guys don’t post at least a few comments, I am totally going to be convinced the Freddy already got to you all.

One last thing. You know how scary movies are always better when you watch them with a group of friends? Go see the movie and we can all be scared together.

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