Remodeling Garbage as Lawn Ornaments
It is the season of The Great Tease here in Wisconsin. The snow is melting, birds are chirping and the mercury is pushing 50 degrees. Although I greatly appreciate this momentary lapse in winter, I also acknowledge that a snow storm is likely on its way and that the mercury shall return to its usual place near 25 degrees by next Thursday. In the meantime, I shall take advantage of briefly seeing my lawn and explore the debris that’s been lurking under several inches of snow since November.
For example, I was recently reminded that we did a poor job cleaning up after our last round of demolition, as there are several stray pieces of lath now laying exposed in our nasty, barely breathing lawn.
They add that certain “je ne sais quoi” to the landscape that says “these people have got class.”
And of course, because we are all about curb appeal, there’s this decaying monstrosity that briefly resided in our living room…
In other words, here is our Christmas tree. We hid it back here in January while we waited for the next scheduled brush pick up, which occurs once a month in our town. We then proceeded to forget, until yesterday, March 5th, that we hid the Christmas tree. Brush pick up doesn’t happen again until April. This further illustrates that we are classy, classy people.
It is only when you consider the backdrop for these lovely lawn accouterments that you can fully grasp the true harmony of crap that is occurring outside our home.
You will find the shards of lath in a swath of dead grass and mud behind this melting mound of filthy snow.
And the “Christmas tree?” Well, that lies 10 yards from this lovely scene of dead and rotting plants littering a sea of garden muck.
Ah, Spring. You come in like a dirty, used-up street urchin and go out with the glory of Mickey Rourke circa the 2009 Academy Awards, except you’re prettier and your dog doesn’t die. You are the flourishing birth-mother of beauty and warmth that just happens look like a hag when she first get here. But, I, for one, am thrilled to see you, gnarly teeth and all.
Yeah…it’s Mother Nature’s way of doing the walk of shame:-) hee, hee, hee.