A Constructed Life

Mullet for Life

Mullets. What in the world do they have to do with home remodeling? Very little, except that the occasional construction worker or handyman still proudly sports one. Hopefully it’s paired with plumber’s crack so you can really get some enjoyment out of it.

Anyways, I’d like to pause from the home remodeling jibber jabber to share a little known fact about mullets. One that only a small handful of people know about. Until now. Ready?


I had a mullet.

Yes, that’s me in that picture in all my 3rd grade mullet glory. And yes, I do look like a boy. And yes, I do have a childhood memory where some addressed me as ‘Sonny boy.’ And yes, I was devastated.

In an effort to appear more feminine, I permed that mullet in 5th grade, which coincidentally was the same year I got glasses. This combination lead to a very unique and special look:


The lasers are a nice touch, don’t you think? Cheri took one look at that picture and asked “Were trying to be like Jem and The Holograms?” Whether I was channeling Jem or Barbie and the Rockers, I thought that background was the coolest thing since Debbie Gibson’s ‘Electric Youth’ perfume. It was way better than the mundane background of ‘blue’ that my classmates were selecting. I also love how I’m displaying a yellow plastic wristband that was surely slapped on to my wrist as I walked through the gates of a Mullet Festival for ‘Tweens. That poor, poor girl. I’d like to tell her that in another year or two, life will be much less awkward. Largely because I got rid of the mullet and instead began hairspraying my bangs high enough to touch the ceiling.

Here’s the thing with mullets though. They’re hard to give up. So, when I had the opportunity to relive those mullet-filled days of my youth, I didn’t hesitate.


I love how this uber-mullet is a hybrid of my first two mullets. I’ve got the ‘business in the front’ curls on top and the long straight ‘party in the back’ tail. I think it’s a really good look for me.

Happily, that mullet is just a wig I donned briefly for a white-trash themed pub crawl called The Townie Tavern Tour.

Yay for the mullet! Here’s to hoping you see one this weekend!

3 thoughts on “Mullet for Life

  1. Milwaukee Cupcake Queen

    Girrrrl, you KNOW you are itchin’ to run out and get another. Once a mullet-wearin’ gal, always a mullet-wearin’ gal!

  2. iloveupstate.com

    Awesome post! I did one a few months ago that had all my “awkward” school photos and it was actually kinda liberating…

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