To always find the joy
That is my new goal, a late coming resolution. I am blessed. I know this. But all too often, I look right passed it, my eyes landing instead on the To-Dos floating around my world and my attitude absorbs the stressors of the day like a sponge.
There are too many moments in a day when I hate how I sound. When I hear myself say “No” for the zillionth time and feel the heaviness of the word taking over. Being home with my children is not easy, and I’m still learning how to do it. At the end of each day, I want my children to feel loved, happy and supported. I want the bulk of each day to be filled with smiles and to go to sleep knowing I am a positive impact on my kids, and that they are benefiting from the extra time with me.
I don’t say these things because I think I’m failing at this, because I know I’m not. I’m just still navigating my way through it – trying to build each day so it contains some semblance of routine and structure, working in time so each child gets one-on-one attention, mental stimulation, a few good laughs and dozens of hugs…while staying on top of doing some laundry and vacuuming and perhaps even squeezing in time for myself.
I know we’ll get there. That I will figure out this Stay At Home Mom thing for myself and my family. And it will be good. It’s just that the Adjustment Phase is feeling a little sticky and my legs a bit clumsy. I’m going to blame it on winter…though it’s been incredibly mild.
Oh Liz, please let me know the secret when you figure it out! I’ve been a SAHM (that’s what people call themselves in the computer world) for a while now and am always filled with that self-doubt…
Am I making the most of this time?
Am I 90 % enriching my kids and building them up and hopefully less than 10 % torturing them?
Am I being the best mama I can be?
Oh the questions go on and on…
I think you are doing one hell of a job…
Would love to see more pics of your adorable kids!
Love!
Liz, as always you will find the path to be a perfect mom as always, don’t worry, be happy. There are far too many other things in this life that can take a person down, however, there are far too little things that could ever take you down. You are an awesome mom and wife and daughter-in-law one our family would never ever exchange for someone else. You are doing a fantastic job, your kids are happy as is your husband. You just need to make sure you are happy as well. We love you.
i hear myself like a record too. it hink it might be the inner parent in me
Don’t be so hard on yourself and let the little things go. I agree its hard, I have been struggling with trying to balance work/home and life in general…You always wonder if you are giving them everything they need to thrive. My gut says yes but my head second guesses me. We are getting ready to make some big changes like potty training so I am not going to stress myself out just yet…